Busy, Busy, Busy…
For several months now, I’ve been a productive member of society, and I’m feeling pretty good about it. I’ve been upright and conscious and sometimes, being upright and conscious is a bigger feat than one might think.
That is not to say, of course, that I don’t have my moments. Moments where I fear that nothing is actually ok, or moments that I fear that this thing will get the better of me.
This thing. I love how I call it that, rather than sticking to some sort of formal title. Oh, no. A formal title would be far to real for me, thank you. So I’ll stick to calling it whatever comes to mind that particular day.
I’ve been working a lot lately, working and going to school and going to work placement for school. I hear people in my classes talking about their work, and how they don’t have time to do extra shifts because they need to focus on school.
What makes me stop and think is knowing that I don’t make time for school. I don’t make time for the rest of my life. I just work, and work, and work until I have a nervous breakdown. And then I continue on my merry way.
I like being busy because it occupies so much of my time. It occupies my mind, it helps me sleep at night, and it makes me feel like a worthwhile person when I’ve been productive. I think that, at this point, the hard part is going to be balancing out the parts of my life that I need to maintain some semblence of sanity, and the other parts that I need to pass my courses, pay my bills, and keep me in my vices.
October 5th, 2007 at 6:44 am
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