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Niagra Jumper Giving Me Nightmares

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This horse is OKLast week on Depression Talk, we looked at an unknown Canadian man who tried to commit suicide by jumping into Niagra Falls — only he somehow managed to survive. For some unknown reason, my subconscious is fixated on this character. How do I know this? because I keep having nightmares about horses commiting suicide by drowning. It’s normal for me to have nightmares about suffering animals, but not about drowning animals. These nightmares started after March 12, when the world became aware of the Niagra sucide jumper survivor.

Why Horses?

I love all animals and a lot of bugs, too so I’m not entirely sure why my subsconcious has equated the suicide jumper with a horse. Perhaps because the stories I grew up with of wild horses refusing to eat or jumping over cliffs or shoving a muzzle into a bucket of water when in captivity. (I think the latter was featured in a cowboy poem called “The Mustang Bay”).

Perhaps my subconscious is using horses to make me pay attention. Either that, or it’s getting lazy and is just merging news stories and images like some sort of demented Photoshop.

That and maybe because I’ve survived several suicide attempts — although I’ve never jumped over any waterfall and I never had any attempt filmed and broadcast on international news.

Why Should I Care

If my subconscious is worried about this jumper, I wonder why it’s picked this fella. I hear about people dying all of the time and I’m like, “That’s terrible. Pass the popcorn.” Perhaps I’m getting soft in my old age. I’m starting to care about strangers again.


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